After All, Tomorrow is Another Day!

 It's been an amazing few days around here. First of all (and not what I'd exactly describe as "amazing"), I turned 60 years old on Thursday. Gosh, I remember when I thought that sounded old! Haha, not anymore! Yes, I'm probably over the halfway point of my life, but OLD? Me? I don't think so!

David's sisters invited me to meet them for lunch on Wednesday to kick-off my birthday celebration, so I joined them for a lovely one at Cheesecake Factory, one of my favorite places! I am so incredibly blessed to have them in my life as well as each of my brothers' wives. I love my precious Peggy, Denise, Mary Jane, Mary Ann, and Jane! (It does get crazy when I get together with the three at the end; people have a hard time keeping the Marys and the Janes apart!) On Thursday, David planned a very special dinner at one of our favorite Thai restaurants. Although I knew we would be joined by Jon, I had no idea (until just before we left) that Cathleen, Jeff, Sarah, and Jordan would also be there! As if that wasn't enough of a sweet surprise, Blair and Ron flew in from NYC to surprise me--now THAT was a total mindblower! I was chatting with one of my older brothers when this giant balloon
appeared in my garage followed by my favorite New Yorkers! How cool is that? The gorgeous flowers came with the surprise, as well as these beautiful ones from Jeff and Sarah when we arrived at the restaurant.

Friday was somewhat low-key (I needed it), and Saturday the plan was to join Taylor, Portia, Carson, and Wesley for dinner for a family get-together with our other kiddos. As all "best-laid plans" typically go, we were unable to get to Taylor's on David's timeline, and for those who know him, punctuality is a BIG deal to David. As he became increasingly agitated, I admit that I became slightly suspicious that perhaps there was a bigger reason why he was so anxious, but never could I have even begun to imagine what he and our wonderful children had planned! Shortly after arriving at Taylor's, a throng of family and friends emerged from a room where they'd been hiding, shouting, "SURPRISE!" It was definitely an "OMG" moment! I am not often speechless (can you tell?), but I distinctly remember only being able to repeat, "Oh My Gosh"! If I shared all of the photos here, you'd be totally and completely bored--maybe you already are--but here are a few of the moments I will treasure (and accept my apologies for the random placement; I honestly just got tired placing them):



Jordan with Granddaddy

With Jeff, Sarah, and Jordan




With the Girls

 

Carson helping me blow out candles



With my buddy, Wesley

Stealing a kiss

 

Most precious friend--since 7th grade!

With Portia and Wesley




Love my little helper!




The bear had to help, too!

Yummy Bundtini!

Beautiful Beth with Wesley

With my precious Mary Jane!

 

Wesley's Kissing Booth

One for Annie

And one for MJ



DC, T, Me, and C

Uncle Hal and P

Guess I'm not the only one who steals kisses!

 

With my "Baby" brother--
until June, I'm 2 years older than him!
 

Photobomb!

Cathleen and Uncle Hal



My dance card is always open for this guy
 

Surprise!

   

This one didn't fall far from the tree!






Kissing Cousins

Cousin Love



With Beth and Matt

My precious friends, the Whites--
So cool that Matt and Melissa surprised me, too!



Love me some Ken and Elise!



Family shot, but this isn't all of us! :)

Another family shot - we have to swap out photographers!

I've intentionally not written a lot about tomorrow, although yes, it is a pretty big day for me as well. We are to be at Emory at 5:30 in the morning for my 7:30 procedure. I am trusting in His promises and in the knowledge of my doctor. I received this powerful and encouraging message from a dear friend yesterday, and it has bolstered me in a mighty way, "Do not be afraid, my friend. God has already gone before you by bringing this to your attention and He is showing it to you because He is going to heal you and be glorified in it."

 

I will post as soon as possible after the procedure--probably in a few days; in the meantime, someone from my family will post updates to my Facebook page as appropriate. My wish is that you join me in praying for my family so that they, too, will be calmed by His Spirit and comforted by His healing powers.

"Ah, Lord God! Behold you have made the heaven and the earth by thy great power and outstretched arm, and there is nothing too hard for thee." - Jeremiah 32:17

 

Balloons and Lessons

I decided to post an image of "fun" balloons, because I want to forever remember that type, not the type I was tested with on Monday, although I guess my balloon test on Monday impacted my future far more than any special occasion balloon ever did. So there's that...

As many of you already know, I went to Emory Monday morning for a Balloon Test Occlusion (BTO) on my left carotid artery to be followed by an injection of a radioactive drug and then taken to the nuclear lab for further screening. Basically, the nuclear scan is used to further confirm the results of the BTO. During the BTO, I was fully awake and given only a local anesthetic for the insertion of the catheter used to thread the balloon through my right femoral artery. Not to garner sympathy, but let me just say that's why I chose to include a picture of "happy" balloons in my post because it was anything but fun! I cried (yes, like a baby), I moaned (not in a good way), and I shook rather violently (it was really cold in there) and yes, I was a bit anxious (however, since you're strapped down, shaking is held--literally--to a minimum). Throughout the process, however, my doctor did just what he was there to do, albeit a bit longer than originally anticipated. We were told that the BTO would take about an hour and the nuclear scan about 45 minutes to an hour. Well, since I already had scar tissue from the previous angiogram, it took close to an hour to just get the balloon in place! Once that was done, though, my inquiring little mind was somewhat fascinated. The doctor told me when he was inflating the balloon and that I might feel some pressure behind my eye; he was right! It wasn't at all unbearable, but definitely noticeable. The next part of the test took about 30 minutes during which the resident asked me to perform several tests (raising arms in the air and closing my eyes for several seconds to see if they remained steady, blinking, smiling, sticking out my tongue, tracking a pen with my eyes, squeezing his hands, pushing against his hands, wiggling my toes, answering questions, repeating simple phrases--you know, the normal things you do when fully awake and strapped down).

Then, when the doctor deflated the balloon, I heard it! It sounded like a little whine right next to my ear, pretty crazy! The nurse injected my IV with a coagulant to reverse the effects of the heparin which was necessary for the procedure, and that's when the fun began.

Just after injecting the coagulant, the nurse injected the radioactive drug, and while we were waiting for it to infuse, I began to feel weird--how's that for a medical term? My chest felt weighted down and tight as if someone had just dropped an anvil on it, and I became very flushed. My heart rate dropped to 60/40, and although I'm no doctor, I knew that wasn't good! The crazy thing is I that I was totally "in the moment"; I mean, I knew everything that was going on around me. The doctor determined that my reaction was to the coagulant and got me stabilized. Shortly thereafter, they took me to the nuclear lab for the scan. The scan seemed more like an MRI (although I wasn't fully inside a tube) in that the imaging was done with a device that was circular and partially open in one area. I admit that I'm a bit claustrophobic, so I tried to will myself to keep my eyes closed and kept repeating, "you can do this" as this device slowly "ticked" its way around my head. The scan is supposed to take exactly 30 minutes from the start of it to the finish but unfortunately, I had to ask them to stop at the 16 minute mark. Although the sensation was different, I again had a weird feeling--pain in my abdomen, nauseous, and definitely not normal. A resident immediately appeared at my side and began palpitating my abdomen Fearing that I had developed a clot in my abdomen from the BTO, they whisked me down the hall for a CT scan. Let me add that when you're already feeling nauseous, a winding trip laying flat on your back on a gurney doesn't help the situation. Ugh! BUT, how grateful I am to have been in such a place as Emory where the doctors took my "weirdness" seriously! After leaving the CT scan, where nothing unusual was found, I was taken back to the first procedure room to wait until my symptoms subsided. The doctors in the nuclear lab told us there was a small window of opportunity to have the nuclear scan done (because of the drug) and that after 3:30, that window would close. Obviously, we didn't want to miss it; however, when the nurse called them to say I was stabilized and could have the test, the doctor said that I couldn't return! Needless to say, that didn't sit well with my neurosurgery team who had worked so hard to get me to that point, so after a few conversations back and forth, we were told that the nuclear team would restart and do the test IF my nurse agreed to stay with me for the duration. I had a more than amazing nurse named Beth who readily obliged; honestly, she was incredible. She was with me from about 9:30 in the morning until after 4 in the afternoon. After the nuclear scan was completed, I was taken back to the procedure room to wait for a room to open up in ICU, something else I hadn't planned for that day. Anyway...after a short time period, a room opened up, and I spent the night in a posh suite at the Hotel Emory. Because of my unusual reactions, strange episodes, and some really odd numbers in my lab work--blood sugar, platelets, and calcium primarily, the doctor felt that I should be admitted for monitoring. My vitals were taken, blood sugars drawn (forgot to mention that before the BTO, my blood sugar was 43, REALLY low, so they had to give me dextrose prior to starting), and procedure site checked throughout the night to make sure I didn't have any more issues. (Well, I do have issues, but that's another story!) So basically, that's my update. Read on, though, for the most impactful part of my experience...

As I said, when they first attempted to do the nuclear scan, I tried to will myself through it by repeating, "You can do this". Well, that didn't exactly work! When I returned for the scan the second time, I thought about all the people that I knew were praying for me, how worried I knew my husband and family must be, and how the day had not gone as planned and changed my recitation. That time, I kept saying to myself, "You will get through this; God's got this. You have lots of people praying for you; you're going to be okay. God's got this!" Believe it or not, I'm telling the truth! I completely shifted my focus away from "You can do this" to "God's got this!" The procedure was over before I expected it to be! It's as if God himself stopped the procedure the first time to remind me that HE was in control and that I just needed to let go and let Him do what He does! I later thought about the first two statements of faith I learned from Beth Moore, "God is who He says He is, and God can do what He says He can do." As a human being, I know that letting go of control is one of my biggest struggles, but I also know that God CAN do what He says He can do; I witnessed it first-hand with Jonathon. My prayer is that He's not finished with me yet, and that just maybe He's got a few more lessons to teach me!

By the way, I passed both of my tests! Surgery is tentatively scheduled for January 20, depending on the Pipeline rep's schedule since one has to be in the OR during the procedure. The Pipeline is still Plan A, but after the balloon test occlusion, we know that if the doctor has to resort to Plan B, he can occlude the artery, and I will still have normal function. I'm in good hands, ALL the way around!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." - Isaiah 41:10

Reflections and Revelations

It’s been exactly one year and a day since I last posted—not exactly a track record to boast about, but pretty indicative of the way time seems to be flying the older I get. Wow! Remember when we were young and thought we had all the time in the world to do things? Yeah, I don’t remember being that young either! Ha! At any rate, I once again felt compelled to at least take the time to record the events of the past year, another year of wonderful memories made.

• In February, we were blessed by the early arrival of our beautiful granddaughter, Jordan Caroline, to our son, Jeff and his wife, Sarah. Although she made her debut four weeks early, she was (and is) perfect in every way! What a joy she has brought to our lives.

• In March, we travelled to South Carolina for my nephew’s wedding and had such a fun time. It was the first time I had been with each of my three brothers in such a long time; there were lots of hugs and more memories made.

• In June, we celebrated the 30th birthday of our own “babies”, Jon and Jeff. Where did the time go? It really does seem like just yesterday that we were welcoming them into the world (and yes, they arrived six weeks early), so early arrivals are nothing new to us.

• In July, David and I took a little trip to South Carolina to visit my brother and celebrate the 4th. We went boating, relaxed in the sun, and just enjoyed the opportunity to get away from the sameness of our lives.

• In early August, we (David, Jon, and I) went to Seagrove Beach for a few days with our oldest son, Taylor, and his precious family. Jeff and his little family were unable to join us because Sarah was back in her teaching role, but Blair was able to fly down from NYC and enjoy a few days of fun in the sun with us. Ron was preparing for tour so he wasn’t able to be with us. Ah well, one thing we’ve learned these past few years is that the bigger our group gets, the harder it is to get everyone together. A good problem to have. In mid-August, we flew to NYC for a visit with Blair and Ron and were able to take in a Braves-Mets game. Such fun! They always make us feel so welcome and plan such wonderful things for us to do when there. A real highlight of the trip was exploring an area of Central Park that we had never seen before, a part of the park that was like a hidden gem within the busyness of New York—truly beautiful!

• In September, we had the privilege of seeing and hearing our son-in-love, Ron, perform as a guest at Music Midtown. He always gives it all he’s got and is never a disappointment to his fans. We are so proud of the results his (and his wonderful manager, a.k.a. Blair) hard work have yielded in his career. Our grandsons, Carson and Wesley, even got a personal shout-out from their favorite Uncle “Juan” (Carson’s pronunciation) as it was their first concert.

• In early November, David and I went to Jekyll Island for a state conference awards dinner and then to Hilton Head for a little getaway. We had such a lovely time exploring the island a bit, enjoying some good seafood, and soaking up some sun. Later in the month, we celebrated Thanksgiving with Jon, Blair, Ron, Jeff, Sarah, and little Jordan. Since this was our year to have our little NY family here for Thanksgiving, we had our Christmas celebration with them the next day, joined by David’s cousin from Florida as well as her daughter and family. For the past three years, we’ve done a Secret Santa exchange, drawing names amongst ourselves, the kids, their spouses, and David’s sisters and his nephew. We have a Facebook page where we post suggestions for our Santa, and then make a game out of guessing who our Secret Santa is when we actually do the exchange. It’s become quite a fun experience. Biggest news for November is that Jon got a job! He was hired by our new Walmart Neighborhood Market as a cashier, and it has made all the difference in his life (and ours). What a blessing, and it's only a five minute drive from our house which makes transportation easy.

• December, of course, came too soon but brought with it more memory-making opportunities, the best being the celebration of our Lord and Savior’s birthday and another chance to get together with family to share old memories as well as make new ones. We even got to have our precious Cathleen with us—a bonus any day in my book! (Cathleen completed her NP degree in December as well--quite an accomplishment; we are so proud of her!) We ate too much, laughed a lot, reflected a bit, and thoroughly enjoyed watching our grandblessings tear into their Christmas gifts. At their ages, it’s such fun to see the delight in their eyes as they open up yet another treasure.

December also brought with it some rather surprising news, and if you’ve read to this point in this post, I am asking that you please save a prayer or two for me in the coming weeks. As you know (if you’ve followed my blog at any point in the past 9+ years), we are approaching the 10th anniversary of our Jonathon’s aneurysm. This blog was started to record his progress, and (as you also know), has become a way for me to record events in our lives and ways his personal journey has affected each of us. Without a doubt, we are each stronger and more committed in our faith than we were ten years ago. At the time of Jonathon’s aneurysm and rupture, the doctors asked us if there was any history of aneurysms in our family as there often is a genetic link to children having them. Because we had no knowledge of any in either of our families, we answered, “None that we know of”. Well, early in December, I got the startling news that I, in fact, do have an aneurysm in my head (actually, I have two, although the doctor isn’t at all concerned about one of them). I began having issues with my vision sometime in November which led me to discuss it with one of my doctors who in turn recommended that I see an ophthalmologist. Since I don’t routinely see an ophthalmologist, I saw my optometrist who recommended that I see a neuro-ophthalmologist. I saw a doctor with the Piedmont Eye Group who sent me for an MRI which, quite surprisingly, revealed an aneurysm. Within just a few days, I had an angiogram which confirmed the news and am now scheduled for a balloon occlusion and nuclear scan on Monday, January 5, to determine if I am a candidate for a special pipeline procedure to re-route or cut off the blood supply to the aneurysm. As you can imagine, I am somewhat overwhelmed and feel incredibly guilty that I, perhaps, could have interceded on Jonathon’s behalf; however, I do feel that God has protected me to this point and because I know that He is in control and that nothing surprises Him, I believe that He knew all along what was going on with me and that He waited until this time to reveal this news to me. I am being treated by a neurosurgeon at Emory who said that my aneurysm is quite large and has been there for decades; therefore, I am choosing to believe that God has paved the way for me to be in a better place to accept this news. As a mother, it is really difficult to not live with the “what ifs’ on a daily basis, but as a believer, I am fighting to believe that God is totally in control, and as I said, nothing surprises Him. What I ask of you, my friends, is that you pray for peace and protection for my family, and that whatever is determined on Monday (as to how to proceed), we will all be at peace with the procedure. I am truly grateful that I live in an area that offers such incredible healthcare and that I am in the best of care when it comes to my treatment options. I am claiming this new victory in Jesus; To God Be the Glory.