Christmas Reflections

Another Christmas has come and gone. With great anticipation, the day arrived and all too quickly became history. I love Christmas.......the sights, the sounds, the smells, the last-minute preparations (I seem to ALWAYS have too many last-minutes), the celebrations, and most of all the time spent with family. From the time we were first married, David and I have spent every Christmas day with his family at one home or another--some years at our home, some at his parents', and some at other family members' homes. We begin the day at our home with our immediate family and then travel to the "host" home for lunch and fun. This year we travelled to the home of David's cousin and spent the day with a group of 26 (and that's our count with one family of four missing!) What a glorious blessing it is to celebrate the birthday of Jesus surrounded by our loved ones.

Another of our blessings of the season was having our beautiful daughter, Blair, come into town from New York and stay with us for a whole week. After spending almost a week with us at Thanksgiving, this was such a bonus! I remember when she first arrived, thinking how great it was that we had SO MUCH time to spend together, and now the day has come for her to go back.......and I'm just not ready. I admit; I'm never ready for her to leave. I always have more on my "to do" list that we didn't do, more that we didn't say, more that we just "didn't". I am filled with such a mix of emotions each time she leaves, but the most profound of them all is always a blend of pride and joy--pride in the woman that she has become and joy in knowing that she is living a life she loves and returning to a city she loves and people she loves. So as we leave her at the airport later today, I will cry just as I am now, but I have learned that my tears are just my way of saying, "Goodbye, my sweet girl; I'll be counting the days until we see you again." (And in the meantime, just keep on living your dream!--Oh, and remember who you are!)

Of course, this blog began almost five years ago as a way to celebrate and share Jonathon's recovery with friends and family so I would be remiss not to mention the blessings of his life and the joys we've experienced in watching his progress. He is truly a miracle, and we thank God every day for letting us keep him here with us and using his life as a testimony to others of God's grace and faithfulness. This past semester brought new challenges to Jonathon and forced us to make some painful decisions, but through it all we tried to remain focused on the blessings rather than the difficulties. We decided mid-semester that it was in Jonathon's best interest to withdraw and regroup, so with heavy hearts we moved him back home in October. We are in the process of working out arrangements for another type of therapy, called Cognitive Reorganizational Therapy, to teach him new ways to process and recall what he learns. We are hopeful that this new therapy will help him become more pro-active in identifying and expressing his educational needs to prevent feeling so overwhelmed with the workload. Additionally, we are working with his Vocational Rehabilitation counselor to gain approval for a reduced course load. If and when that all falls into place, Jonathon should be able to return to classes next fall. Please join us in praying for yet another hurdle to be jumped.

This is beginning to look and sound like a "Christmas" update letter so to continue along that path......Jeff moved out about two weeks after Jonathon moved home. As happy as I was (and am) for him to find his own place, I admit that it would be nice for him to be around for Jon's sake. I know that Jonathon gets lonely (and probably bored) being here with David and me most of the time. On the positive side, though, Jeff is really great about taking him over to his place to hang out. Just last week, he bought a new couch and announced that now Jon would have a place to sleep if he wanted to stay over! I'm confident that Jon will take him up on that offer. Jeff is a gem and extremely committed to Jonathon and to seeing him become all that God desires him to be. He clearly loves his twin brother and wants the very best for him. Jeff is a truly unique young man and a blessing to each of us every day.

And finally, in other Clark news.....we have been given the "green light" to share our newest (and smallest at the moment) blessing: Drumroll, please.......We will be welcoming another little Clark into the world next July! Taylor and Portia shared this most wonderful news with us at the beginning of November but asked us to wait to announce it for a few more weeks. For two excited and proud grandparents-to-be, that was a huge request, but we somehow managed to restrain ourselves and wait for the go-ahead. I waited for them to make their announcement at our Christmas family gathering before posting it here, but now I can no longer contain myself--I'M GOING TO BE A GRANDMARY! SO EXCITED! God has once again blessed our family. Please join me in lifting Taylor, Portia, and their precious little gift in prayer during this new season of anticipation. Christmas Blessings to you and yours ~ Mary

Christmas Day 2009

(and baby makes eight!)

Thanksgiving '09

It's almost 7:00 p.m., and our Thanksgiving Day is pretty much over. We're already in our "hanging out" clothes (a.k.a. pajamas) and feeling too full (STILL), somewhat sleepy, and ever so blessed. We had the joy of celebrating Thanksgiving with each of our four amazing children and our beautiful daughter-in-law. In addition, David's two sisters, brother-in-law, nephew, and cousin were here as well as one of my brothers, his wife, and son. All in all, we had a group of 16......a small group compared to some of our other family gatherings!

As I reflect on the day, I realize how very much I have to be thankful for......things that I so often take for granted in the chaos of every day life. Of course, I will be forever grateful to my Lord for sparing our sweet Jonathon and giving him a future. I am thankful to have a God who loves me in spite of myself. I think, though, that too often as I recognize the miracle of Jonathon, I sometimes overlook many of the other blessngs of my life. Things like:
1. My amazing husband of over 33 years and the love that has grown stronger through each of our joys, sorrows, and trials.

2. The beauty of living in the same home for over 30 years--a home where we raised our four beautiful children.
3. Our son, Taylor, who is married to his "true companion"--a blessing beyond words--who has grown into a man of honor and integrity and who continues to be a source of immense pride.

4. Our daughter, Blair, who has grown into a beautiful, strong, amazing young woman--someone who makes me incredibly proud to call her my daughter, as well as my friend.

5. Our son, Jonathon, who is alive today purely by the grace of God and who knows that God has a very special purpose for his life.

6. Our son, Jeff, whose strength never ceases to amaze me--whose loyalty to Jonathon and concern for his future is beyond measure, the kind of loyalty that is based on a bond that has only grown stronger over the years.

7. My brothers, David's sisters, and their families--through the years we have become each other's support systems. Through the laughter and the tears, we've "been there" for each other, and I am eternally grateful.

8. My wonderful friends and co-workers who tolerate me and embrace me in spite of my shortcomings.

9. A church family that has grown more precious to us with the passing of time, a group that rallied around us in our greatest time of need and made sure that our needs were met.

10. Parents who left a legacy of love and the importance of family. The lessons they taught and the memories they left impact our lives every day and will, hopefully, carry through to the next generation.

My list seems pitifully short in comparison to the mulitude of blessings in my life. I pray that I never forget to be thankful.

Is Anybody Going Where I'm Driving?

They say the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. GREAT........At this rate, I'm on a fast track straight to the not-so-divine down under. Why is it that I can't seem to at least occasionally eek enough time out of a day to keep this blog updated? When I first started it well over four years ago, my days were no longer than they are now, and yet I still found time to update almost daily! Maybe I need to stop saying I'm going to update and do like Nike says and, "Just Do It!"

So here goes another attempt at bringing my life up to speed, although I might change lanes and shift gears occasionally.....

• Jonathon and I had a wonderful trip to Savannah a few weekends ago. To those who covered us with prayer, we thank you. I picked Jonathon up on Friday morning and we drove from Athens to Savannah, something I'd never done. If you, too, have never made that trip, let me just say that it is a lovely drive! With our trusty GPS programmed for our destination, we took off into the wild blue yonder, and "yonder" is a perfect word for some of the small towns we travelled through. We drove over half the trip on back roads to get to I-16, but like many back roads, we were often the only car on the road for miles, something that is a bit of a rarity around metro Atlanta. We arrived in time Friday afternoon to get settled at my daughter from another mother's apartment and meet her for dinner. On Saturday, the three of us went to the wedding which was held in one of Savannah's historic squares, and then Jonathon celebrated with friend's at the reception while my daughter and I relaxed at a venue overlooking the Savannah River. When the reception ended, Jonathon met us for dinner and the three of us wandered along River Street, enjoying the sights, sounds, and delicious smells of OctoberFest in Savannah.
• Jonathon's return to school brought several changes to our lives. He is now living in an apartment style dorm which offers him a greater level of independence and quieter study environment. It is on campus so he still has access to campus transportation, but it is also so close to the building where all of his classes are held that he often walks to class. He didn't know his roommate prior to move-in, but has been very fortunate in being assigned one with whom he gets along really well. His roommate has been really helpful in including Jonathon on trips to the grocery store and inviting him along for workout sessions and trips to the dining hall. Without prompting from us, Jonathon has begun some strength exercises to build up his arm and shoulder strength, particularly on the left side. His roommate has been really supportive and encouraging; we feel really blessed.
• As he has transitioned to his new intended major, Jonathon has been faced with several challenges, many stemming from the fact that the Recreation and Leisure Studies program involves a great deal of physical activity in the form of games and exercises. Initially, he was a little hesitant to participate, creating a bit of a gap between the other students and him. One day he seemed to turn the corner when he called me and said, "Mom, I've got some exciting news! I broke into a sprint today in class!" It seems that the class was doing some activities that involved running into and out of a jumprope, and he actually did it! He said he just challenged himself to see if he could do it and was pretty pumped that he actually could! I think the secret with Jonathon is in believing that he can succeed. When he convinces himself that he can't do something, he's almost always right but when he truly believes that he can, he experiences at least some level of success. Isn't that true about each of us, though?
• Since Jonathon's return to school, I have begun working full-time again. The transition from part-time to full-time has been an adjustment for each of us. It seems strange to me to be on a regular schedule again after more than four years of flexibility. I've spent so much of the past few years working my schedule around Jonathon's that it is hard to believe that I no longer need to do that. Of course, when I accepted my position, I wanted it understood that my family would always come first. Each of my children and my husband are so precious to me that no job in the world is worth sacrificing one moment of time with any of them.

So I guess that's enough catching up for now. I'm sure I've omitted things, but the most important thing for me to remember is that no matter how often I slip up or how many times I disappoint myself, God is always there to pick me up when I slip up and love me in spite of my disappointments.

"Yes, the Lord longs to be gracious to you;
he rises to show you compassion,
For the Lord is a God of justice.
Blessed are all who wait for him."
Isaiah 30:18

Travel Mercies

Jonathon and I are traveling to Savannah this weekend to attend the wedding of a college friend of his, so this is just a short request to ask for prayer for safe travel. I am picking him up in Athens later this morning, and we'll drive from there. You know he must really like this girl to be missing a Georgia game!

I have much to update (I've been a real slacker!) since he's returned to school, so I'll plan to do that when we return. Go Dawgs!

Scares, Prayers, and Miracles

We took Jonathon back to his beloved Athens yesterday to get him settled for another school year, a trip that I'm sure he has been eagerly awaiting since the moment he moved home for the summer. WE, however, are always filled with feelings of excitement as well as anxiety when we make the "move-in day" pilgrimage, and this year, the feelings of anxiety were even greater after having spent nearly ten hours in the Emory ER with him on Wednesday night/Thursday morning.

On Wednesday morning Jonathon and I made a back-to-school shopping trip in preparation for the big move, and while we were out he complained that the right side of his head felt sore or bruised, attributing it to wearing a baseball cap for prolonged periods. I honestly didn't think too much about it, nor did he, and when we returned from shopping, I went in to work for a while. David arrived home before I did and called me with an urgent request that I come home as quickly as possible, stating that Jonathon's head was noticeably swollen on the right side. I drove home as fast as I legally could and when I saw Jonathon, I was quite unnerved. His head was as swollen as it had been just a couple of days after his plastic surgery last summer! In fact, it was so puffy that his glasses were creating an obvious groove in his skin. As I drove home, I called David and asked him to pack an overnight bag for Jonathon, fearing that he would have to undergo some sort of procedure during the night. Our first fear was that the shunt that had been inserted in April of 2005 was malfunctioning causing cerebral fluid to back up in his head. This is something we have known could happen and have been on the lookout for ever since he had it inserted. Needless to say, we didn't want to unduly alarm Jonathon but we wasted no time in getting him to Emory. (Ever the loyal brother, Jeff was right there with us!)

After his initial triage where we gave the nurse his medical history, we found ourselves playing the waiting game--one that lasted HOURS. Jonathon was exibiting no signs of distress or any neurological decline, so I guess that's why they didn't seem to be overly concerned. After about an hour or so, he was finally taken to x-ray and for a CT scan. He then was returned to the waiting room where we waited at least another hour before they came to draw blood to check for any infection. After ANOTHER couple of hours, during which no one was called from the waiting room, I approached the charge nurse to inquire if his tests had even been read. He said he'd "check on it" and that they would get to Jonathon as quickly as possible--yeah, right! Anyway, I guess the squeaky wheel really does get the grease (or the pushy mom gets action) because within the next thirty to forty minutes, we finally were taken to an examination room. The ER doctor came in for an initial exam, basically to tell us that the neurosurgical team was in surgery and would be in to check on Jon as soon as they were able. (Please know that I NEVER complain about a doctor being tied up in surgery. My son, after all, was one of those emergency cases!) At that point, we just got Jonathon comfortable and waited some more! Finally at almost 3 in the morning, the neurosurgeon came to tell us that they had reviewed his tests and could find NOTHING wrong! He said the shunt was functioning properly (Hallelujah for that!) and there was no evidence of any type of trauma to the brain itself that could cause such swelling, nor was there any reason to hospitalize Jon. He said that the problem was most likely related to the implant either "shifting" or leaking and that we should contact his plastic surgeon--not exactly what we wanted to hear, but definitely a relief that there was nothing neurologically wrong. We waited another hour or more for him to be discharged and finally arrived home at about 5:15 on Thursday morning.

Of course, I was awake by 8:00 to start calling his plastic surgeon to try to get him seen, and as luck would have it, his doctor was out of town for several days and there was no way for them to get him in that day. We were able, though, to get him an appointment for Friday morning. He remained swollen throughout the day on Thursday, and that evening I sent out an urgent prayer request to my Bible Study friends and faithful prayer warriors. (I learned later that many of those friends forwarded my email to others who, in turn, forwarded to still more!) In my request, I asked specifically for the following:

1. we find answers
2. the swelling to be significantly reduced
3. the option(s) to correct the problem not have a major impact on his return to school
4. whatever recuperative period that might be required would be well tolerated
5. God’s hand would guide and protect each of us during this frightening time

Well, let me tell you, God heard our prayers! When Jonathon awoke on Friday morning, the swelling had been greatly reduced--I'd estimate at least by 90%. It was so minimal by comparison to the previous day that I was almost embarrassed when we saw the plastic surgeon! She read the CT scan and checked the implant carefully for any signs that it had moved and assured us that it was exactly where it was supposed to be. In addition, she said that the implant is made of a type silicone that cannot leak. Bottom line, she said that she had no explanation for what had happened. She could only speculate that he had either had a blow to the head that he didn't remember or that he had experienced some sort of allergic reaction or that he had been bitten by something. Whatever had happened, she said, there was no reason for us to worry any more. I then told her that she should have seen the list of people who were praying for him, and she basically said, "That's your anwer!" She said she could tell from reading his chart that prayers on his behalf had been answered on more than one occasion. I told her that we had been particularly anxious about getting him in to see someone at their office because he was supposed to be returning to school on Saturday. She asked where he went to school and said, "Pack your bags, Jon!" Of course, upon hearing that, Jon said, "How 'bout them Dawgs!"

God IS so good; I know I say that often, but when I think of the many times and ways that He has shown His faithfulness to Jonathon and to our belief that His plans for Jonathon's future have yet to be revealed, I can't help but proclaim His goodness! To those who have continued on this journey with us, we are humbled at your support and encouragement. God is indeed good! How blessed we are!

In closing I want to share something that one of my dear friends sent me in response to my request for prayer: "Just remember how far God has brought Jon… and while the journey was long, the blessings were many. We won’t allow the enemy to creep in . Cling to this promise…

Ephesians 6:16: “take up the shield of faith, with which I can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one”

Yes, the journey has been long, but with God's help and the encouragement of such amazing friends and family, we will continue to travel it as long as God sets it before us. We are grateful to be able to live the life we lead, and as my friend said, the blessings, most definitely, have been many.

Family Fun

The Shaw Clan

(Minus Morgan, Gordon, Jr., Melissa, Janna and Julia)

The Clark Clan

(Minus Ross)

The David Clark Clan The BEAUTIFUL Clark Children ;)Jon enjoying a little pool time!

It's been since Taylor's wedding in 2007 that ALL of the Clark/Shaw Family got together..........sad, I know! BUT..........on Saturday, we were able to get all but two nephews, one spouse, one niece and two adorable little girls together. Getting a family of our size together is never easy, but always worth the effort!! From the pictures above, you can see the fun had by all!

The initial reason for the gathering was for a book my sister-in-law is writing on the lives of my mother and grandmother. She wanted to get together with as many family members as possible in order to interview everyone for stories, memories, etc., of these two women who influenced our lives. We are all so excited that she is taking on this project and are extremely proud of her for being awarded a grant from Duke University to write it. My mother was raised by her mother and grandmother after the death of her father when she was only 11 years old, and the letters, scrapbooks, diaries she kept weave a most interesting tale of growing up as a true southern belle. In addition, the letters and postcards that my grandmother kept over a five year period from my grandfather in the early 1900's reveal a love story filled with issues that parallel many modern-day romances--advertisity, jealousy, doubt, insecurity, distance, ultimatums, and at least one break-up in which each had other romantic flings, but underneath it all a love too strong to be denied and a reconciliation and marriage. AHH! Good stuff! I can't wait to see the finished product!!! We are truly blessed to have her tackle this project and have their story come together.

I guess it takes growing older to really appreciate family, or maybe it just takes maturity. Either way, I know that without the love and support I have received over the years from my parents, siblings, spouse, children, and all of our extended family, I would not have grown to be the woman I am today. I thank God every day for blessing me with such an amazing group of people that I am so proud to call MINE.

July Shenanigans

Jon and Jeff enjoying a little tubing at Lake Murray in SC

Can you believe this is the same guy the doctors told us would likely exist in a vegetative state IF he survived? Ha! To witness the miracle of his very existence each and every day is a blessing beyond words.

Jonathon's summer has been filled with activity and excitement. He's gone tubing (as evidenced above), gone to Six Flags (riding the ONE thing his dad asked him not to--roller coasters, yes plural), chaperoned middle schoolers on a week-long retreat at Lake Burton in north Georgia, served the Lord as a "mingler" at a homeless shelter, attended a fraternity brother's wedding with a group of Fijis at Chateau Elan, worked Sunday mornings as a Sunday School assistant and daily as an intern in the youth department at our church, and will be going to Stone Mountain with a church group in a couple of days. I'd say he's had a pretty fulfilling summer, wouldn't you? He has one more week of his internship and then we'll be preparing for him to return to school. I can't believe how quickly this summer has flown! When I reflect on previous summers, this has been by far the most active, independent one Jonathon has enjoyed since 2004. What pure joy it has been for each of us.

We continue to pray for his healing and I ask that you include another young man, Justin Bellmor, who is struggling to recover from a bleed similar to Jon's. We know that God has special plans for each of these young men. As He teaches us, He has plans for their future! Let's remember, also, to pray for each other.